Right now,
remind yourself of the truth.
Remind
yourself that the New Year means nothing if your mind is still boxed up
in its comfort zone.
Don’t fool
yourself into living the same year 90 times and calling it a life.
And don’t
just think outside the box in 2020…
Think like
there is no box.
Open your
mind!
How?
Start by
asking yourself better questions.
Questions
that break you away from all the comfortable distractions in your life,
so you can refocus your thinking on what matters most…
01.
In one
sentence, who are you?
02.
In one
word, what do you live for?
03.
What's
the number one change you need to make in your life in the next twelve
months?
04.
What
is worth the pain?
05.
What
will you never give up on?
06.
What
do you always try to avoid?
07.
What's
something you take for granted every day?
08.
What
do you need most right now?
09.
What
would you immediately do differently if you knew no one would judge you?
10.
What's
something no one could ever steal from you?
11.
Who
would you like to forgive right now?
12.
Happiness is not __?
13.
What
impact do you want to leave on the people you love?
14.
Life
is too short to tolerate __?
15.
What's
something that used to scare you, but no longer does?
16.
What
do you want to remember forever?
17.
What
do you always look forward to?
18.
What
do you appreciate most about your current situation?
19.
What
recently reminded you of how fast time flies?
20.
What's
something everyone should be able to say before they die?
(And what should everyone be able to say before the end of 2020?)
A Slightly
Deeper Dive into Self-Questioning
As I alluded
to in the intro, the questions you ask yourself on a regular basis can
determine the type of person you become. Self-questioning, when
leveraged effectively and consistently, gradually frees your mind to
focus on what matters most. This process is something Marc and I have
successfully guided hundreds of our coaching clients and course students
through over the past decade, to help them cope with the various
debilitating sources of stress that were holding them back.
If you’d like
to better cope with the stress in your own life in 2020, I’ll give you a
few bonus questions to consider. Unlike the questions above, which focus
on the big picture of what’s important to you, the following will
support you when you’re derailed by the frustrations of life’s smaller
everyday encounters. The key to using these questions is embracing the
fact that most of the frustrations and stress in your daily life could
be avoided if you would simply take the time to ask, “What else could
this mean?”
So next time
a random life situation starts to get the best of you, pause, take a
deep breath, and then ask yourself:
-
What’s
the story I’m telling myself about this situation?
-
Can I be
absolutely certain this story is the truth?
-
How do I
feel and behave when I tell myself this story?
-
If I
stopped telling myself this story once and for all, what else might
I see, feel, or experience?
Give yourself
the space to think it through carefully. Mull it over consciously. And
see how doing so opens your mind to respond more peacefully and
appropriately in the year ahead.
(Note:
Self-questioning and other self-coaching practices are also covered in
detail in our New York Times bestselling book, Getting Back to Happy:
Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality, and Turn Your Trials into
Triumphs.)
Now, it’s
your turn…
Above all,
what you need to remember is that it’s not the answers you get from
others, but the questions you ask yourself that will help you grow
stronger.
So I
challenge you to re-read and reference all the questions above
throughout the year. And keep in mind that they have no right or wrong
answers. Because asking the right questions of yourself, regularly, is
the answer.