20 Things To Start Doing In Your Relationships
FAMILY ISN'T ALWAYS blood. They're the people in your life who appreciate having you in theirs—the ones who encourage you to improve in healthy and exciting ways, and who not only embrace who you are now, but also who you want to be. These people—your real family—are the ones who truly matter. Here are twenty tips to help you find and foster these special relationships:
1. Free yourself from negative people.
Relationships should help you, not hurt you. Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be. Choose friends whom you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you— people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it.
2. Let go of those who are already gone.
We rarely lose friends and lovers, we just gradually figure out who our real ones are. So when people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you. It doesn't mean they are bad people, it just means that their part in your story is over.
3. Give people you don‟t know a fair chance.
Everyone has gone through something that has changed them and forced them to grow. If you give them a chance, you'll find everyone has something amazing to offer. So appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you naturally let go of old ones that no longer work. Trust your judgment. Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and be ready to meet someone who might just change your life forever.
4. Show everyone kindness and respect.
Treat everyone with the same level of respect you would give to your grandfather and the same level of patience you would have with your baby brother. People will notice your kindness.
5. Accept people just the way they are.
In most cases it's impossible to change them anyway, and it's rude to try. So save yourself from needless stress. Instead of trying to change others, give them your support, and lead by example.
6. Encourage others and cheer for them.
Having an appreciation for how amazing the people around you are leads to good places—productive, fulfilling, peaceful places. So be happy for those who are making progress. Be thankful for their blessings, openly. What goes around comes around, and sooner or later the people you‟re cheering for will start cheering for you.
7. Be your perfectly imperfect self.
We are not perfect for everyone, we are only perfect for those select few people who really take the time to get to know us and love us for who we really are. And to those select few, being our perfectly imperfect self is what they love about us.
8. Forgive people and move forward.
Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is OK.” It is saying, “I‟m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the remedy. It doesn't mean you‟re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you‟re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.
9. Do little things for others every day.
You can‟t be everything to everyone, but you can be everything to a select few. Decide who these people are in your life and treat them like royalty.
10. Pay attention to who your real friends are.
Real friends have an honest heart and will go out of their way to help you when you need it most. Real friends are the ones who know you as you are, understand where you have been, accept who you have become, and still encourage you to grow.
11. Always be loyal.
When it comes to relationships, remaining faithful is never an option but a priority. Loyalty is everything.
12. Stay in better touch with people who matter to you.
Stay connected with those who matter to you. Not because it‟s convenient, but because they‟re worth the extra effort. Remember, you don‟t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you can be certain of. Paying attention to these people is a priority.
13. Keep your promises and tell the truth.
Lying, cheating, and screwing with people's feelings and emotions hurts. Never mess with someone‟s feelings just because you‟re unsure of yours.
14. Give what you want to receive.
Don‟t expect what you are not willing to give. Start practicing the Golden Rule. If you want love, give love. If you want friends, be friendly. If you want money, provide value.
15. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
Don‟t try to read other people's minds, and don‟t make other people try to read yours. Most problems, big and small, within a family, friendship, or business relationship, start with bad communication.
16. Allow others to make their own decisions.
Do not judge others by your own past. What might be good for one person might not be good for another. What might be bad for one person might change another person‟s life for the better.
17. Talk less and listen more.
Support the people you love—don't stage-manage them. Often what they need is the space to hear their own inner voice.
18. Leave petty arguments behind.
There are many roads to what‟s right. And most of the time it just doesn't matter.
19. Ignore unconstructive, hurtful commentary.
No matter what you do, there will always be someone who thinks differently. So concentrate on doing what you know in your heart is right. What most people think and say about you isn't all that important. What is important is how you feel about yourself.
20. Pay attention to your relationship with yourself.
One of the most painful things in life is losing yourself in the process of loving others too much, and forgetting that you are special too.